unkhs:

I used to be like “I wonder what would happen if I set this thing on fire” and since then I’ve learned that more often than not the answer is “it’ll be on fire”

tanakas:

if you’re mad at me please just tell me what i did wrong instead of ignoring me

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ REBLOG THIS IF YOUR FOLLOWERS ARE FABULOUS.

fvming:

If only I was given a dollar for every time I made myself look stupid in front of a cute person

I’ve discovered there’s a lot you can do inside haunted houses.

fictionalfeather:

For example, you can:

  • be in a shampoo commercial

image

  • start a boy band:

image

  • spot some choice booty:

image

  • break into song:

image

  • see some people in frankly offensive outfits:

image

  • attend a metal show:

image

  • listen to some sick jams:

image

  • discover zombieism:

image

  • sample some tasty snacks:

image

  • watch someone get burned bad:

image

  • find something you really like:

image

  • find something you really, really like:

image

  • find something you REALLY REALLY LIKE:

image

  • and wonder if you left the stove on:

image

pizzasarcasm:

Or worse, her.

pizzasarcasm:

Or worse, her.

bonus:

reasons why i stop replying: 

  1. i’m busy
  2. you’re boring
  3. i’m mad
  4. you replied with one word
  5. you asked for a pic
S.S.  (via tobeheal-ed)

stop telling girls
that they’re not skinny enough

stop telling girls
that their feet are too large

stop telling girls
that their stomachs need to be flat

stop telling girls
that they should always cross their legs

stop telling girls
that they have too much muscle

stop telling girls
that a d cup is too large

stop telling girls
that their thighs are too fat

stop telling girls
to suck in their guts

stop telling girls
not to sit like a man

stop telling girls
that their fucking curls are too big

stop telling girls
that they can’t take up space
like a fucking man can
because
yes
they
fucking
can

baby's first words

mom: say mama
mom: say ma-ma
mom: say it!
baby:
baby:
baby: I came out to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now

neon-vagina:

bigeisamazing:

ronaldreagay:

laughing cow cheese huh?
image
I BET THAT COW WASNT LAUGHING WHEN YOU SLAUGHTERED IT HUH

you don’t kill a cow

to make cheese

image

this is literally my favorite

disgustinghuman:

[sighs internally]

[sighs externally]

[sighs eternally]

© str-wrs